Two tall trees, a birch and a beech, were growing in the woods. A small tree began to grow between them, and the beech said to the birch, "Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"
The birch said that he could not tell. But, just then, a woodpecker came by and landed on the sapling. The birch said, "Hey, woodpecker, you're a tree expert. Can you tell if that tree is a son of a beech or a son of a birch?"
The woodpecker leaned over and took a taste of the small tree and replied, "It is neither a son of a beech nor a son of a birch. It is, however, the best piece of ash I have ever poked my pecker into." Ah ... profanity like scandal is in the mind of the beholder.